Teenagers!

As Andrea said below - we now have 5 kids.  CC was with us for 3 days back in June for respite - just waiting for her new (transitional) foster mother to get home from vacation.  That home would be the place she stayed in while she was (VERY quickly) transitioned into an adoptive home.  The adoptive home only lasted a month.  From what she and her case worker (actually he's an adoption specialist, but whatever) said it seemed like those folks didn't actually want to deal with a teenager.  I wonder, if the transition went slower and they got to know each other better before moving her in, would this have happened?

We got the call last Wednesday - the day we were leaving to visit Andrea's parents - a 7 hour drive away - that CC needed a place.  She really liked her stay with us - and who wouldn't - we let her stay up, go on the computer whenever, she had no responsibilities, etc.  That's because she was with us for only 3 days AND her birthday was on her first full day with us.  We found that out right before her case worker left the evening before ("Oh, by the way, her 13th birthday is tomorrow").  So, when the placement person called this time, I was like, "Oh, I don't know, we are going out of state for the next 5 days and the car is tight - we have 4 kids now, including a brand new (to us) 4 month old."  Placement person: "Oh, that's great, I am sure CC would LOVE to go with you all, it would really take her mind off her disrupted adoption."  Ummmmm, ok.  Dang these people know how to sell a kid (aka make you feel guilty).

CC with the in-law's horse

So, I called Andrea.  Now, when CC was here last, I only saw her for 3 hours of her entire 3 days with us.  I hung out with her the first night while Andrea went to a school function, the second night CC was out for her birthday & I had fallen asleep before she got home, she was asleep when I left for work the next day and then left before I got home that evening. Andrea really liked her & wanted to help her.  I understood that but I wanted to say no.  Actually, I told Andrea, I do not want to do this, I am not ready to take on a teenage girl, especially one that is going to have some issues (she has NEVER been in a good foster home & her bio family has pretty much disowned her for saying, "yes, there are drugs around and yes, I get hit, etc") - so there are issues deep inside, even if she is good at holding them in.  I felt that with 3 kids under 4 and a 9 year old, we had enough on our plate.  BUT, I also knew that Andrea HAD to help her.  She would not be able to live with herself if she didn't at least try.  So, ultimately I said, I don't want to do this, but I will.  And I think we can help her, while she is with us and she hasn't been bad.  Granted it's only been a week - so we are in full honeymoon period here - but she's helpful, helps a ton with the baby, loves out dog & cat, gets herself up and moving in the morning without a word from us, does her homework with zero issues, etc.  So far, so good.  Who knows what I will be saying a month from now though.

I do have one issue.  Facebook.  She is a typical, dramatic teenage girl on Facebook and it makes me CRAZY.  We are both friends with her to keep an eye on things, but my lord, I might have to hid her.  The drama, the (purposeful - i hope anyway) misspellings, the pictures with "deep" sayings, the cursing.   I don't know if it's even worth discussing it with her (well, so are going to discuss the cursing) but the other stuff, is it even worth it?  She is so negative on Facebook, but not really in person, so I don't get it.  I think it's all just for attention, but man, it's annoying.

Teens!